croissant on ceramic plate

Emerge: 35 + When The Dots Connect

“The photos above are a testament to the slow progress, but progress. Celebrating this milestone. The scale isn’t everything, but loving this 35-year-old body”

— Me

On the cusp of turning 18, I remember writing in my journal, “I am finally becoming the woman I always wanted to be.” Pause. Huh? What did I know fully about womanhood? While I love laughing at myself because I giggle every time I read that entry. I also try my hardest to honor who I was. Because at 18, that felt real to me. Let’s just say I’ve always been a deep and reflective soul.

17 years later, those sentiments still ring true: I am becoming the woman I always wanted to be. Confident in who I am and who I am not. Bold and fierce when needed. I believe that there are years where God keeps us hidden, yes. But I also believe sometimes we shrink and say it is God’s doing when it is not. I have definitely spent many years shrinking, so it feels good to use my voice as He sees fit.

 A few years ago, the word Emerge kept coming to my mind. From random signs on the highway to hearing and seeing the word everywhere. I just knew that there was something about this word that I needed to explore. And that I did. It took me to the life of David (in the Bible) who I fully relate with A man after God’s own heart, yet imperfect and messy. I used to desire the story that was spotless so people could see my goodness, now I desire for people to see His goodness in me. This reminds me of David’s life and journey. He was overlooked, imperfect, and not necessarily the first choice. But He was the man for the job. He was anointed to be King.

I took that word and I ran with it, and I invited a group of my girls over at the end of 2019 for us to discuss. The message behind it was God raising up His daughters to emerge into whatever space He was calling us to. Then 2020 happened, and I was a bit confused. Nothing about 2020 felt like an emergence. It felt like pain, loss, and confusion. I thought, “God did I hear you wrong?” or “Was I reaching here?” But God in His goodness reminded me that we can be so limited in our thinking. That His words only last a specific time-frame. It’s just not true. This word has permeated ways that have blown my mind.

Early this year, I signed up for a Speaking & Coaching Accelerator Program via Marshawn Evans. I wasn’t sure why, but I knew I was supposed to. It was a leap of faith in EVERY way. And God moves tremendously. Do you know what’s funny? Marshawn spoke the same word, Emerge over me. See below for the details. And you know what’s EVEN crazier? The current program I am in through my job is called, “Emerging Leaders Program.” Isn’t God something? The dots have connected that has me in awe.

But what’s amazing about all of this, is that it’s not just supposed to stay with me. It never was. God needed to work this message out in me, to get it through me. For the good of others. For the good of other women. I hope you stay tuned because TOGETHER has always been what my heart bleeds.

Reflect + Prep: The word Emerge means to rise or come forth. To come into view. For the person reading, what area is God asking you to RISE up in? Identifying where you might be shrinking is a good place to start.



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